This statistic was reported in bullyingstatics.org in 2010. I believe this, do you? This is outrageous and what are we doing about it? Addressing this crime of children vs. children, is tantamount in reducing crime in neighborhoods, drugs amongst teenagers, and stress in the workplace, to name a few. Actually, we would be living in a peaceful, kind and loving environment where children succeeded to the best of their abilities and parenting became the focus of the family. Our persistent need to focus lack of success in other directions is about accountability and who wants to be accountable? Is it really about test scores. All schools are focused on the end result and yet it has been shown in studies and experiments even in the last 10 years that when the focus is on students engaging respectfully in activities where they feel joy,success, and relationship that test scores rise and children reach their potential.
New York did a great experiment with ballroom dancing. It even became a movie. And we didn’t even notice all the incredible results of that experiment. The students were grades 4-8 and the reduction in bullying was significant, test scores went through the roof, and the best of all, the students learned to respect each other and work together and they were happy!
Though the experiment was not noted as Emotional Intelligence, all the behaviors taught and encouraged were exactly that. And so why isn’t every school teaching ballroom dancing? Why are they eliminating art and music? And so goes the right brain and all the nurturing and developing of it with all its ramifications of socially inappropriate children.
There is a great way to address a bully! It is builds confidence and motivates one self to reach goals and set boundaries. When someone speaks a demeaning voice to you, just simply say, “May I Have A Happy Thought, Please!” I know this sounds weird but it works. I have taught many children to say this to their bullies. It is risky and makes them vulnerable but it is safe and it answers a negative with a positive. The bullies are flummoxed and though it may not work the first round, it does work eventually. The bullied child feels empowered, confident they can take care of themselves and it motivates success. Yup, all that from one phrase!!!
Please comment! I would love to hear from you, Karen